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Find your tribe, love them hard.

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Find your tribe, love them hard.

Hey mamas, here is to you !

Here is to you natural birthing, no epidural, breastfeeding, cloth diapering mama. Here is to you c-section, formula feeding, disposal diapering mama. Here is to you all organic, baby wearing mama. Here is to you jar food and pouches mama. Here is to you who is just like me.

I am a mama who breastfed my babies for 18 and 22 months.  I am a mama who co-slept with both my girls. I am a mama who believed in feeding mainly homemade food for my babies. But does any of  that really make me better than any of you? Absolutely  not!

We all are doing our best at this motherhood gig. All that truly matters is that mom and baby are safe and healthy, that there is an abundance of love and we are giving this life our best.

momhood

Being a mother is hard enough, why divide ourselves? Why compare? There are days I struggle to get out of bed, stay in my pjs, yell and maybe even scream at my children all day and order pizza for dinner. There are days I put make up on, get my hair done, get dressed and feel like I can take on the world…until about lunchtime I realize, this stuff is hard, when is nap time. We are all just taking it day by day . The notion of being perfect in every single aspect of life is nonexistent to me.Why do we strive for something that is not even remotely possible?Is it the society who puts so much pressure on all of us? Or is it us who do that to ourselves?

We definitely cannot be the same person who have the cleanest house, with the smartest kids, traveled the world, seen things more than others have, maintains the perfect circle of friends, look amazing and flawless all the time, plan the perfect dinner parties yet succeed at work like a boss?We all can do our best and try to be good at one or more of these but you cannot master all this while raising a human being. If you can then you must be a super human being 🙂 . But most of us are far from it. I know I try my best to do good on some of these things but there is no way I am trying to be a perfectionist, it is not realistic to me. I have messy floors because I have children, not because I am lazy. I try as hard as the next person to pick up after them but some days I cannot keep up with them. As a mom I let a lot of things slide.

So instead of being so hard on ourselves, by diving ourselves into categories can we all form a tribe? Can we call motherhood a union of friendship, honesty and a common ground to come and lift each others up? Being a mother is SO hard but if you have the right people to share this with, you have yourself a village and it does truly take a village to raise a human being.

Can we just lift each others up and not compete? Let’s form a tribe and love them hard. We all know there is not a greater joy than being a mom but also it is the most challenging job there is. In order for us to succeed we need to find our tribe. A tribe is our circle who have the similar struggles and is always there to share their stories and lift each other up. I know in my circle of friends we share a lot of our stories, good and bad. We have our own unique connection. We cheer on each other and we also sympathize with the struggles. Can we all be better at uplifting each others? Absolutely! But I take this support and friendship any day  over standing alone and doing this motherhood job alone all by myself.

So do you have a tribe? A village that you lean on? If you do, do not let them go and love them deep!

XoXo,

PJ

And this is why we travel !

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And this is why we travel !

Barcelona days“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails.  Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain

Probably one of my favorites, if not, my absolute favorite ever. It is a simple quote with such a powerful message. Us , human beings have been defying nature since the origin of time. We have been doing things that is not necessarily “normal”. That’s how we grew, we civilized and we learned. This behavior seems to simple yet it is so complicated.  So why stop now? This is the question I have been asking myself a lot lately and really trying to put things into perspective.

Having two kids so close in age, back to back took a toll on our overall well-being. It was mentally, physically and emotionally exhausting . But one thing we both promised ourselves is we will not stop to live our lives. It is so easy to get lost in their daily schedules and our own struggles but we refuse to do that. Yes, we are a normal parents who have to work hard and earn their way of life but we are also the parents who are healthy (so far) and physically capable of doing what we put our minds into. We may not have unlimited resources of anything but what we have is our willpower and our curiosity. We want to do things not because we have to but also because we want to. We want to see the world through our children as much as we can.

That is why we travel!

A lot of people have asked us if we have “lost our minds” when we travel with two kids in a tow. Yes it is not easy to travel with two little kids , yes it is not easy to set up a eating and sleeping schedule when your time zones are completely different from home but it is also not easy to stay at one place and not experience things. We may not be perfect but we want to get out and about and travel the world one country, one city and one continent at a time. We are not traveling family , actually quite far from it but we want out children to grow up thinking my parents did something right. They showed us the world even when we did not remember. I want them to say thank god we were introduced to various cultures and people and places which we can’t remember but somehow helped us shape the human being that we are today. That is what we want them to say. Also, travel does not have to be extravagant or expensive, you could just play tourist in your own city and explore as well. There are so many hidden gems around you, you just have to look. People think children thrive on routine, but we beg to differ. Not saying routine is bad, but for our family we do not believe in a lot of formal routine. Everything has been on-demand and spontaneous since they were little kids. So either it is good or bad, we still do it that way. Things may change when they grow a bit older but for now we will try and will try really hard to live an interesting life for them.

For your children, you are the most important people in their lives so why not include them on everything , if not , in most things that you do.

A lot of families have different priorities, they want to be more settled and explore when the kids are a bit older and that is also okay. I am not saying what we are doing is okay. I am only saying we do this because we feel like it fits our lifestyle and our kids’ personalities. I know a few of you have texted, emailed and messaged me on Facebook saying thank you for sharing our travel experiences with them and also asked for some tips and tricks. You know what? Those comments completely flatter me. I am so humbled to even give an ounce of encouragement to anyone who is struggling to muster up the courage to travel or do things differently than the norm.

We all need to remember WE are the grown up here, WE make the choices and WE make it happen. So let’s not wait for the right time to do anything, let’s just do it.

As I Mark Twain said in his quote above, you will probably regret NOT doing things in your old age than you actually did when you were young and able. For us it is travel and for you it may be something else. But let’s just do it and make it happen and let’s excite our children!

The recent happenings

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Hello world-

What have you been up to? It sure is a beautiful day out isn’t it?  Is it the “momtitude” on me that makes everything look so splendid that happens around me. I have heard about how being a mom changes your whole perspective on how you see things around you but did not believe too much of it but i am realizing the world around me is changing. Most things are changing for the better, but some of course are not. I may not have this positive attitude all the time due  to sheer exhaustion of raising two toddlers but I sure get this wave of appreciation for things around me every once in a while. So read on 🙂 .

Being a mom means you now have a whole lot of responsibility period! You also don’t know what self less love feels like until you have become a mom. You now have this tiny little person that you need to care for. Days become longer but years become shorter. It is just fun being a parent.

Of course, I don’t have a minute to myself. I don’t have a Pinterest perfect home. I don’t cook culinary delights anymore. My days/months are spent planning for their birthdays, their outfits for their school photos , heck their everyday outfits. I run around the house like a headless chicken trying to feed everyone and myself.  All I can say is it has been one heck of a ride (being a mom that is) and I wouldn’t change this for anything in the world.

I know it has been over a few months that I wrote a blog post. I just have had too many things going on. We just recently moved into a new house so talk about packing,unpacking, decorating, purging hit all at once and top it off with two toddlers and a dog (don’t forget my full time traveling husband). A has started to go to a Montessori school. I am especially excited about this as I wanted to see her prosper and thrive into a Montessori environment (hopefully). M has started to babble and talk up a storm and her favorite word? You guessed it- its NO!

Kids are doing great, Bella is still very much a puppy and growing healthy . Life has gotten a whole lot sweeter.

This post didn’t really have a solid weight behind this but I wanted to just fire off something at you all wonderful people since you haven’t heard from me in a while. So with one more promise to be frequent I am going to stop typing. Feel free to send me feedback and messages regarding anything you would like to read or see on my blog. For now, enjoy my insta feed- it sure is colorful there @pjmomblog 🙂 .

See you there!

XoXo

PJ

 

 

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